Homeless

Last night we watched Secret Millionaire on tv where a wealthy man took to the streets for a week to volunteer helping the homeless on skid row of L.A.  He didn't tell those he met that he had money but gave a story of losing his business and being on the down and out himself.  After a week, he not only revealed he was a multi-millionaire but he also gave sizable donations to the various organizations or people he had "volunteered" with.  The faces of those many homeless has stayed with me today and is obviously influencing my drawings.

Pencil sketch

The previous sketches have been with conte or charcoal pencils.  Today I got out my trusty #2 pencil and blended only by adding more strokes rather than smudging with my finger or a stub.  My son worked on this boy's computer while I tried to capture him with my camera.

18"x 24" pencil sketch

The Power of Fear

I spent most of my life avoiding painting because I had a fear of drawing.  That fear caused me to waste a lot of time that could have been spent enjoying what I was yearning to do.  Why do we give in to our "fear voice?"  Why did I?  Although I've been painting now for a while, I avoided drawing at all costs.  I would use tracing paper, projector, light box - you name it.  All to avoid drawing.  Joe Alleman has helped me to see shapes and trust that I could draw shapes.  You see it isn't drawing a tree, a barn or a person but the shapes that all come together to make up what we think we see.  Carl Purcell also is a master who helped me see things as shapes and values.

The assignments I was given in the portrait drawing class I'm taking was to copy the shapes and values we saw of various Hollywood stars.  If I watched more movies I'd know all their names but that's another story.  The first drawing I was so insecure that I make a copy of it and did the assignment on the copy as insurance against messing up so much that I'd ruin the original.  When that drawing came together I threw caution to the wind and did the other assignments directly on the "master."    I ignored my "fear voice" (oh yes it was still shouting inside my head) and just drew.

Now I have to figure out how not to be too hard on myself for avoiding drawing all these years.  I've come to realize that mistakes are a part of the learning process and it's okay if I screw up.  WOW is that freeing.

Today's drawings.  Yes, I realize that I need to get more values down.  Yes I realize that I am new to sketching and don't have the crosshatching part down yet.  Yes, they are not perfect and that's OK!!

Don't wait - Do it NOW

I have always wanted to learn how to draw but I was afraid I couldn't do it so I didn't.  The same for painting.  I was always envious of those who had artistic talent and never felt I did.  It was my fears that kept me yearning instead of doing.  My first art classes were given by an artist who painted abstractly with very big brushes.  The benefit was I didn't have to know how to draw.  Abstracts were great.  I would just hint at what the subject was and get away with it but inside I've always wanted to learn how to draw.  Finally I'm taking a drawing class and yes, I've started with a portrait class and surprising myself that I'm capturing the likeness.  My advice is don't wait to do whatever it is you've been yearning to do.  Do it NOW.  Be willing to make mistakes - that's part of the process of learning and really it's no biggie.  I should know - I've made plenty of them myself.

Stretch Marks

Yesterday I attended a live model session and brought my oil paints with me.  Once again I felt pretty intimidated by the quality work that the professional artist around me were doing and vowed to work even harder at becoming a better artist.  I want to stretch myself.  As many new mothers have discovered once you are stretched you never quite go back to the same place.  I know that what it will take to become a better artist is to become better in drawing.  Not having taken any formal drawing classes before, I've signed up for a portrait drawing/painting class that begins tomorrow.  The approach I took in the past to learn to draw was initially I would blow up photos and then trace over them.  With each drawing, I would trace less and less lines telling myself that I was imprinting on my brain the experience of drawing well.  I have reached the point where I don't trace anymore so something in this process must have worked.

Today to practice, I took one of the photos of yesterday's model, clipped it to my 18"x24" sketch book and have spent the morning sketching.  I can see that I'm approaching the values (darks and lights) pretty timidly and need to build my confidence and just do it.  Many artists won't try to paint portraits so I give myself a pat on the back for attempting this and fortunately my experience with Mike Malm last May has given me the confidence to do this.  You, my friends and family, are welcome to journey along with me.  You will get to see the good, the bad and the ugly and hopefully like in pregnancy, the journey and the resulting stretch marks will be worth it.  This sketch isn't done but I thought I'd post it while I still had the nerve to share it with you.